压力时期是教孩子适应力的机会-InnerSelf.com

: By 凡妮莎·洛布（Vanessa LoBue）

感谢造访 InnerSelf.com，哪里有 20,000+ 宣传“新态度和新可能性”的改变生活的文章。所有文章均翻译为 30多种语言. 订阅每周出版的《内在自我》杂志和玛丽·T·拉塞尔的《每日灵感》。 InnerSelf杂志 自 1985 年起出版。

为了保护全美的学生和社区免受COVID-19的侵害，许多地区已转向数字学习或课堂教学与虚拟学校的混合体。 ZEPHYR /盖蒂图片社

在全球COVID-19大流行之间，经济衰退 and widespread protests over racism, it's difficult for everyone.以及对种族主义的广泛抗议，每个人都很难。 Many people are struggling, consumed with anxiety and stress, finding ourselves unable to sleep or focus.许多人在挣扎，焦虑和压力下进食，发现自己无法入睡或无法集中注意力。

RedFern 发展心理学家和研究员 on anxiety and fear in infants and young children, I have been particularly concerned about the impact of the pandemic on young people's mental health.关于婴幼儿的焦虑和恐惧，我特别担心大流行对年轻人心理健康的影响。 Many have not physically been in school since March.自三月以来，许多人从未上过学。 They're isolated from friends and relatives.他们与亲戚朋友隔离。 Some fear that they or loved ones will contract the virus;有些人担心他们或亲人会感染该病毒。 they may be hurt in racial violence or violence at home – or they might lose their home in a他们可能会受到种族暴力或家庭暴力的伤害–或者他们可能会在磷火 or flood.或洪水。 These are very real life stressors.这些都是现实生活中的压力源。

几十年的研究 have documented serious consequences from chronic stress in childhood.记录了儿童期长期压力造成的严重后果。 But psychologists have identified ways in which parents teach children how to cope with adversity – an idea commonly known as resilience.但是，心理学家已经确定了父母教孩子如何应对逆境的方法-这种想法通常被称为韧性。

童年压力的影响

Children cannot be protected from everything.无法保护儿童免受一切侵害。 Parents get divorced.父母离异。 Children grow up in poverty.儿童在贫穷中成长。 Friends or loved ones are injured, fall ill or die.朋友或亲人受伤，生病或死亡。 Kids can experience neglect, physical or emotional abuse or bullying.孩子们会遭受忽视，身体或情感上的虐待或欺凌。 Families immigrate, end up homeless or live through natural disasters.家庭移民，无家可归或天灾人祸。

可以有长期后果。 Hardship in childhood can physically alter儿童时期的困境会在身体上改变大脑结构 of a developing child.发育中的孩子It can impair可能会损害认知和社会情感发展，影响学习，记忆，决策等。

Some children develop emotional problems, act out with aggressive or disruptive behavior, form unhealthy relationships or end up in trouble with the law.一些孩子会出现情绪问题，表现出攻击性或破坏性行为，形成不健康的关系或最终陷入法律困境。 School performance often suffers, ultimately limiting job and income opportunities.学校的表现常常受到影响，最终限制了工作和收入机会。 The risk of suicide or自杀的风险或滥用毒品和酒精 can increase.可以增加。 Kids who are exposed to chronic stress may also develop遭受慢性压力的孩子也可能发育终身健康问题包括心脏病，中风，肥胖，糖尿病和癌症。

So how do some kids thrive amidst serious challenges, while others are overwhelmed by them?那么，有些孩子如何在严峻的挑战中壮成长，而另一些却不知所措？ Researchers in my field are working to identify what helps children overcome obstacles and flourish when the odds are stacked against them.我这个领域的研究人员正在努力找出什么方法可以帮助儿童克服障碍并在遇到困难时发扬光大。

似乎归结为支持和弹性。 Resilience is弹性是定义 as the ability to spring back, rebound or readily recover from adversity.作为在逆境中反弹，反弹或轻松恢复的能力。 It's a quality that allows people to be competent and accomplished despite tough circumstances.这种品质使人们即使在艰难的环境中也能胜任和成就。 Some children from一些孩子困难的背景 do well from a young age.从小就做的很好。 Others bloom later, finding their paths once they reach adulthood.其他人后来开花，到成年后便找到了道路。

发展心理学研究的先驱安·马斯滕（Ann Masten）将复原力称为“普通魔术。” Resilient kids don't have some kind of superpower that helps them persevere while others flounder.有弹性的孩子没有某种超级能力可以帮助他们在别人挣扎时坚持不懈。 It isn't a trait we're born with;这不是我们与生俱来的特征。 it's something that can be fostered.这是可以培养的。

帮助孩子增强韧性的关键因素

一样执行功能技能 that create academic success seem to bestow critical coping strategies.取得学术成功的人似乎赋予了关键的应对策略。 With the capacity to focus, solve problems and switch between tasks, children find ways to adapt and deal with obstacles in a healthy way.通过集中注意力，解决问题和在任务之间切换的能力，孩子们找到了以健康的方式适应和应对障碍的方法。

Controlling behavior and emotions is also key.控制行为和情绪也是关键。 In a recent在最近根据一项研究，，尽管受到了虐待，但仍保持情绪平衡的8至17岁的年轻人患抑郁症或其他情绪问题的可能性较小。

“依恋关系” provide a lifelong sense of security and belonging.提供终身的安全感和归属感。 A parent's or caregiver's父母或照顾者的持续的支持与保护 is crucial for healthy development and the most important of these relationships.对于健康发展至关重要，也是这些关系中最重要的。 Other caring adults can help: friends, teachers, neighbors, coaches, mentors or others.其他有爱心的成年人可以提供帮助：朋友，老师，邻居，教练，导师或其他人。有坚定的支持提供稳定性，并帮助孩子建立自尊，自力更生和力量。

Ruth Bader Ginsburg is an icon of resilience.露丝·巴德·金斯堡（Ruth Bader Ginsburg）是韧性的象征。 She grew up in a Brooklyn working-class neighborhood and lost her mother – her main support figure – to cancer before graduating from high school.她在布鲁克林工人阶级社区长大，高中毕业前失去了母亲（她的主要抚养人）患癌症。 She persevered, graduated first in her class at Cornell University and ultimately became one of only four women to serve on the Supreme Court.她坚持不懈，在康奈尔大学（Cornell University）的班级中首先毕业，并最终成为在最高法院任职的仅有的四名女性之一。 Another example is John Lewis, who was the son of sharecroppers in segregated Alabama, yet become a pioneer in the civil rights movement and served 33 years in Congress.另一个例子是约翰·刘易斯（John Lewis），他是阿拉巴马州偏远地区农作物的儿子，但后来成为民权运动的先驱，并在国会服务了XNUMX年。

如何在家里增强韧性

There are many ways parents can help their children build resilience.父母可以通过多种方式帮助孩子增强韧性。 Allowing children to talk – and really允许孩子说话-确实听 –表现出关怀和接纳，确认他们的感受并帮助他们将问题与背景联系起来。

有时候答案是让孩子有一定程度的自主权。 Trusting them to try things on their own – and even fail – can help them learn to solve problems or deal with anger, disappointment or other uncomfortable emotions.信任他们自己尝试甚至失败的尝试，可以帮助他们学会解决问题或应对愤怒，失望或其他不舒服的情绪。 “平静呼吸”技术提供另一种帮助孩子控制情绪的工具。

重要的是要注意，许多孩子不仅面对一个孩子，而且面对许多 hardships.艰辛。 For example, kids who live in poverty may have less present or less competent parents;例如，生活在贫困中的孩子可能没有现在的父母或没有能力的父母； have high daily levels of stress;每天有很高的压力； suffer hunger, poor nutrition or live in crowded conditions, with few parks;饥饿，营养不良或生活在拥挤的环境中，公园很少； have no health care;没有卫生保健； study in substandard schools;在不合格的学校学习； and have greater likelihood of abuse.并更有可能遭受虐待。

社区一级 interventions can help reduce risks while helping children build resilience.干预可以帮助降低风险，同时帮助儿童增强适应能力。 These initiatives can provide better living circumstances through affordable housing and improve health by reducing pollution.这些举措可以通过负担得起的住房提供更好的生活条件，并通过减少污染来改善健康状况。 Strong programs can engage teachers, parents and community members build a stable support system for local children.强有力的计划可以使教师，父母和社区成员参与进来，为当地儿童建立稳定的支持系统。

“社会和情感学习”课程在学校中越来越受欢迎。 This curriculum teaches children to understand and manage their feelings, develop empathy for others, make responsible decisions and solve problems.该课程教孩子们理解和管理自己的感觉，同情他人，做出负责任的决定和解决问题。

这些程序产生有形的结果：对270,000名参与者的分析表明学生 raised their grades by an average of 11%.他们的成绩平均提高了XNUMX％。 Other studies revealed that fewer participants dropped out of school, used drugs or engaged in criminal activity – and school behavior improved.其他研究表明，辍学，吸毒或从事犯罪活动的参与者减少了，并且学校行为得到了改善。

Helping children build resilience is particularly critical now, as Americans face particular turbulence in daily life.现在，帮助孩子们增强适应力变得尤为重要，因为美国人在日常生活中面临着特别的动荡。 Parents, too, need to guard their mental health in order to provide kids with crucial support: Building resilience isn't just kid stuff.父母也需要维护自己的心理健康，以便为孩子提供至关重要的支持：增强适应能力不仅是孩子的事。

超过 5百万个孩子 in the US experience some kind of trauma each year.在美国，每年都会遭受某种创伤。 Thousands more live with chronic stress.成千上万的人患有慢性压力。 So amid a global pandemic, it's more important than ever to provide children with as much support and “ordinary magic” as we can.因此，在全球大流行中，为儿童提供尽可能多的支持和“普通魔术”比以往任何时候都更加重要。